Cabin in the Woods

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before – five college students take a vacation at a creepy, deserted cabin in the woods. They intend to party and hook up in the midst of all the scenic natural beauty, but they’re interrupted by… something horrific.
Of course you’ve heard it, it’s like the basic plot of one out of every six horror movie ever made. But “Cabin in the Woods” is decidedly different. Right from the opening it informs the audience that everything is not as it seems, and then proceeds to unfold a witty, self-aware, genre-exceeding, half-parody that’s entertaining and enjoyable to watch, especially for fans of the horror genre.

The titular cabin in the woods is actually a highly monitored, controlled environment, overseen by an entire team of scientists in a bunker far below. They science team is not only watching and listening in, but is capable of manipulating events through a variety of physical controls and chemical stimuli. Now, I realize that that sounds like a spoilerific thing to say, but it’s actually not. For anyone who had seen the trailer, it was revealed there that there was some element of virtual reality/science fiction going on, and then the movie itself opens with the project administrators.
The science fiction element is interwoven throughout the film, it’s not held out as some sort of “twist” or “reveal”.
When the students arrive at the cabin, they find some unsettling things. A creepy painting, a two-way mirror. It doesn’t slow them down, however, from your typical college students on vacation behaviors. Swimming, getting wasted, fooling around… in fact, they’re smack in the middle of a game of truth or dare when the science team running the experiment blows open the hatch to the cellar door.
Down in the cellar are every conceivable style and make of horror talisman known to fiction. Music boxes, creepy diaries, dolls and masks, puzzles, amulets, a conch shell, dozens more that I haven’t even mentioned. Still not suspecting what’s going on, or that they’re being monitored and manipulated, the students begin to play around with all the things that they shouldn’t… to disastrous consequences.
There, the horror begins, but to me, it was always overshadowed by the science element. I was always far more interested in why this was happening to what was happening. Not that the horror angle wasn’t decently shot, acted, directed, made, whatever word you want to use, but having the “Control Room” angle completely neutered it for me. I never really cared that the kids were getting terrorized/brutalized/traumatized, I was wrapped up in WHY. Which kind of undercut the horror for me, and wound up being an element of disappointment.
Also, unfortunately, the final reveal was a considerable let down to me. The ultimate underlying reason behind all the goings on here was a disappointment to me. A big let down. It felt hackneyed, cheap, and lame. Which is the reason that I won’t be pitching in on the building of the altar for this movie that’s currently going on out there. I’m sure you’ve seen it.
Which is a testament to the rest of the movie, I guess, seeing as I still enjoyed the film quite a bit and plan on recommending it on the podcast. “Cabin in the Woods” strikes me as more of a genre send up than an actual entry into the genre. It’s far too self aware to come across as sincere, and in many ways comes across as satire. That’s the kind of thing that can interfere with a first viewing if the film doesnt announce its intentions properly. There’s a good twenty to thirty minute period though when the secrets are on the table, and the movie is approaching its climax, where all hell breaks loose and the movie is literally batshit crazy. I think it’s pretty much impossible not to be watching with a huge ass grin on your face.
It’s a fun movie that references and samples from almost every horror movie ever. Once it’s “wound them up and let them go” there are segments that border on legendary. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, and keeps a good sense of humor throughout.
I just don’t want to get carried away.


B+

Lockout

Catastrophe strikes during the President’s daughter’s humanitarian mission to an orbiting space prison, and she’s take hostage during an inmate uprising. Now she’s isolated in space, surrounded by hundreds of hostile inmates, and time is running short before the prison station’s orbit decays and it plummets to Earth.
Rescue seems impossible.
Thankfully, the country has just the guy for the job.

Wise-cracking ex-CIA agent Snow (Guy Pearce) is caught in a set-up.
After attempting to intervene and save an ex-contact’s life, Snow makes off with a valuable briefcase, but is framed for murder and treason. Captured, interrogated, and beaten, Snow is told he’ll be put into stasis for 30 years… without a trial.
However, at the same moment, events are unfolding which will lead to his opportunity for freedom. During a humanitarian investigation of the treatment of inmates aboard the orbital prison MS One, the President’s daughter (Maggie Grace) is captured during a prison uprising. She had suspected that wealthy corporations were funding research on prisoners in stasis in order to test the potential for deep space travel. She also feared that the stasis itself is harmful to prisoners, potentially causing dementia. While interviewing a prisoner, however, her team is the catalyst in the escape that leads to the mass awakening and freeing of the prisoners, and her subsequent captivity.
A direct assault on the prison is deemed too dangerous, both for the President’s daughter, and to the stability of the station. Should the station fall out of orbit, it could obliterate the eastern seaboard. So the plan becomes to send in a single operative to attempt to rescue her.
Snow.
Even though it sounds like a suicide mission, Snow accepts. It’s his only chance to escape stasis, and his associate who hid the briefcase is on the station. He’s going in.
Onboard, a cheesy action movie with a dash of action movie romance ensues. Snow is a wise cracking, exasperated pessimist, and yet sparks fly between he and the President’s daughter. In a nearby space station, the President and the Secret Service try to coordinate his mission remotely, giving plenty of opportunity for Snow to balk at directions and crack wise. The villains are wonderfully menacing, and often are their own worst enemies. There’s plenty of fun to be had watching them chew scenery, threaten hostages, and fight with each other. And of course, eventually the station loses orbit, so the countdown clock to destruction is on.
Pearce is fun as the singly named Snow, and Grace gives him someone to trade barbs with nicely. There arent that many great action scenes, per se, but the story manages to keep your interest pretty well, and then the characters move it along.
It’s a fun enough movie, but never really over the top enough for me to fully enjoy it as cheese. Nor is it quite serious enough for me to embrace it as a straightforward actioner. As it is, it’s kind of a light, disposable, don’t think to hard action flick, but I doubt it’s anything that would make a “Cheese-Tastic Classic” one day. Were one of the mind to, you could easily pick a thousand holes in it, or point out some of the occasionally bad CGI, or the low-budget acting, but the movie knows what it is and just tries to give you some entertainment for your ticket price.

American Reunion

The American Pie gang is back.
With (roughly) ten years having passed since the first movies, the cast from the American Pie trilogy has a perfect excuse to return with a fourth installment – the high school reunion. “American Reunion” brings all the old classmates back in to town to reconnect and reminisce for a weekend. Of course they bring new problems with them that they didnt have in high school, seeing as they’re older… Marriage, children, careers, etc. Yet put them all together and they find a way to fall right back into their familiar rhythms and drunken sex antics.
Surprisingly though, “American Reunion” was a really well done comedy, with the added bonus of getting to spend time with old familiar, characters. It all added up to be highly enjoyable…
Just like warm apple pie.

“American Reunion” opens with Jim and Michelle. Still married, they now have a young son. I didn’t say “happily” married, however, because the two have fallen into a bit of a rut as far as their love life is concerned… they’ve lost that loving feeling. It seems like something that married couples would work through, but it happens to be rearing its head just before their high school reunion.
In this case, the high school class in question is the class of ’99.
As much as things have changed, many things still remain the same. Jim still can not get sexually aroused with any degree of privacy or physical safety. Thankfully, his father is still around to provide uncomfortably frank counsel. Steve Stifler is still as obnoxious as ever, perhaps even more so now that the rest of the group has matured. “Oz” Ostreicher has become a bit of a celebrity, with a career in sports broadcasting and an appearance on “Celebrity Dance Off” under his belt. Paul Finch has begun traveling the world, and still occasionally reminsces about Stifler’s mom. And Kevin Myers remains the character who you’re just not sure what his role is in the movie.
Putting them together reignites many of the same behaviors of past movies. There’s drinking and partying, hooking up, MILFs, and plenty of awkward sexual situations. Jim’s next door neighbor has grown up into an attractive young teenager, and she wants to act out on her childhood crush on him. Of course, this is going to complicate the already tenuous situation between Jim and Michelle. Add in the fact that Stifler is driven to throw a wild pre-reunion party so he can hook up with chicks, and you can see how things might get out of hand. The rest of the gang is brought along for the ride, including Jim’s dad, who is recently a widower, and who comes along to “get out of the house”. Of course, he winds up encoutnering Stifler’s mom. In fact, several of the cast deal with romances, but just like the first “American Pie”, they really only serve to but some breathers into the comedy.
And I have to say… it was a really good comedy.
It was really, really, funny. Seriously, I laughed pretty much from beginning to end. At times like, really cracking up. The movie didnt break any new ground, but it never felt like a straight up reheat, either. They just took the “American Pie” players, with as solid an excuse as any (the reunion), and created a new set of situations for them to get into. I’ll have to say that a lot of the enjoyment of this flick had to have come from revisiting the characters again, because it can’t be THAT good… but I was laughing through like the entire movie. Stifler was back in people’s faces, Jim is caught in every kind of embarrassing situation imaginable, and even Oz has some funny moments this time. Jim’s dad (Eugene Levy) and Stifler’s mom (Jennifer Coolidge) have one of the funniest post credits sequences you’re ever going to see. The comedy is crude and lewd at times, but they do it very well. The pacing is great, the jokes are solid, and the cast holds up their end.
All in all it greatly exceeded my expectations, and I went in hoping it was going to be good. The familiarity with the cast and characters added a level of nostalgic comfort to a well written comedy, and I laughed for through the entire showing.
Fans of the original series should consider this “Can’t Miss”.